So five years ago yesterday, three completely coincidental events happened. October 21, 2003 marked the first and only time I attended the CMJ Music Marathon. I got to see several amazing shows – Broken Social Scene and Stars at the Bowery Ballroom, Mac from Superchunk/Portastatic in a weird conference room in the midtown Hilton (same place I saw the Trachtenberg Family Slideshow Players or whatever they were called), Ted Leo at CBGBs (the only time I ever set foot in the punk rock Mecca), and a few other run-ins I’m forgetting (involving Screech and Elijah Wood – one story is far more interesting than the other, I’ll tell you in person if you want) and had a wonderful week of shows with some of my WDOM pals.
The second coincidence was that the previous night, I swore off caffeine, so that Tuesday morning was my first day “detoxing.” It started as being a temporary abstenence – spend a week to flush it out of my system and then moderate my intake. However, strangely enough, it lasted for nearly three years (even though it didn’t help me sleep any better – the primary reason for giving it up – and I sleep infinitely better today, over two years after I picked it back up). Luckily, I didn’t experience any of the major withdrawal symptoms – headaches, fatigue – which was lucky since the week I decided to spontaneously give it up was also the week I was galavanting around lower Manhattan for several late nights in a row, sleeping on the floor with 5 other people in our hotel room. It did help cast that week in a strange haze.
The other reason for this haze (and the most public of these three convergences) was that Tuesday morning before leaving, my friend Carlin’s away message read “Elliott’s dead.” A few minutes later, I found the article that announced that Elliott Smith was found dead of an apparently self-inflicted stab wound to the chest (as much as we’d like to think that someone else was involved, it’s never been confirmed as anything else). As the five of us that went were all big fans of his work (my friend Dan wrote a great eulogy for our school paper at the time), it was even stranger to be among people associated with college radio right after one of the most revered figures of the format passed away. It made a surreal week even more surreal, and more importantly it was the best place to be to remember one of the best songwriters of my generation.
A year after his death, I wrote that I hoped to remember Elliott’s fragile and beautiful songs rather than his ugly ending, and most of the time that’s the case. I still marvel at the craftsmanship in his arrangements and the dark beauty in his lyrics. I’m still amazes at how powerful these songs can be with even the most minimal arrangements; I’m not sure anyone else could command the same awed silence with just accoustic guitar and voice the way that Elliott affected his listeners. Far too often, we celebrate the artist at the expense of his art – and sometimes that leaves us mourning the artist rather than celebrating the reasons we fell in love with that artist in the first place. It’s still unreal that he’s been dead for five years, but the songs he left behind (including all of the pothsumeously released material) will live on hopefully forever as reminders of the beauty, sadness, and fragility of our world.
Chad at Everybody Cares, Everybody Understands (named after a song from Elliott’s XO) posted a dozen different posts of videos, live songs, cover versions from Elliott’s tribute concert, and miscellaneous rememberances that are essential reading, so go check that out. I think that later this week I’ll try to post the mp3s of the interview I had this past spring with photographer Autumn de Wilde about her wonderful book of photos and stories about Elliott over at the Left of the Dial site. Until then, I’ll dig out my Division Day 7″ and raise my mug in Elliott’s memory.
Posted by Brian 
Posted by Brian 
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